It Must Mean I'm Close...

So, I’ve referenced this several times. I’ve published a book, The Killer and Boyd Burgess, and I’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback about it so far. It is extremely exciting to work so hard on something and for it to be well received.

Now that I’ve said that, I need to let you all know something about me. I believe that we battle a real enemy every day of our lives. I believe that the same Satan that attempted to tempt Jesus in the desert is at war with us, especially when we are on the right track. I give him credit too. As I look around and see the number of lives destroyed each day and I watch how easily people are side tracked with useless tasks that prevent them from accomplishing their purpose, I know that this enemy is far from lazy. In fact, I would say that the Satan that I’m referring too works relentlessly to cause us doubt, misery, pain, suffering, poverty and loss. I say all of that, because today, I feel like I am at war with him, and maybe I’m losing.

I work in a hospitality facility. I have no desire to tell you which facility this is or disclose any of the names affiliated with it. Just know that this is a real place of business. I have worked at this establishment for the better part of 4 years, and I knew when I took the job that there would always be inherent headaches involved. (side note: The American way is to work people more for less, with fewer benefits, higher taxes, worse insurance, and less appreciation…I think headaches are inherent in every job). I started writing this book that I keep referencing in the middle of 2012. For the month I was working on the book, I was excited, positive, motivated, energized, and best of all, I had a lot of time! Then I finished.

I’ll skip ahead to the beginning of 2013. A chance interaction with a guest at my establishment in early 2013 renewed a passion for this story that had escaped me for sometime. The passion had left because much of what was going on around me had stolen my time, my joy, and my self-confidence. The interaction with this guest motivated me to get back to my story and to get it published. In telling her about it, she said it was a story that needed to be told.

Since then, I have had a total revolving door of staff. Every piece of equipment in my facility has broken, been replaced, and broken again. I’ve worked short staffed for months forcing me to cover departments and shifts like never before, our company has gone through a stressful ownership change with every process, function, and benefit reverting back to ground zero. I have issues in my house that cannot be fixed without a complete renovation that I really cannot afford, a banker be rude to me regarding the loan that I was trying to get to do the necessary work, the city around me that I’ve grown to love is laying hundreds of people off every week and panic is starting to set in. Even the church that I attend has been in flux and turmoil. I am trying my best to avoid specifics as I do not want to cross any lines of appropriateness, but I’ll just tell you, my 2013 could be a best selling novel in and of itself. The scary thing is, the things that have gone on are so out of the ordinary that people would never accept that all of this could really be happening in the life of just 1 person. I think you get the point that I’m making.

Just in case it’s still not clear what I’m saying, let me expound. I have no doubt that the enemy is out to kill and destroy, seeking whom he may devour, just like my Bible says he will do. But as I write this I realize something that makes me excited. If there wasn’t something positive on the horizon from me and my story, the enemy, Satan, would never bother coming after me. If I wasn’t getting close, he would leave me alone, but he hasn’t. How exciting? Even more exciting is the trump card. In spite of every frustrating thing that has happened and continues to go on, I have a savior that loves me and is willing to fight for me. I have a savior that will carry me through this storm. Jesus wasn’t tempted in the desert. He overcame Satan. I’ll steal a line from my dad, “I’ve cheated and looked at the end of the book and we win!” So even though I’m stressed, frustrated, beaten down and feel like I’m losing, Jesus loves me! I know that I’m on the verge of something big! I know when the enemy tries to destroy the positive things in your life, turn to my savior because he doesn’t just love me…He loves you too!

P.S. My wife didn't have time to proofread this for me, so if there are mistakes, just forgive me. Sometimes I work without my editor :)

The Happy Couple

Labor Day was an exciting day for me, mostly because I was paid to stay home from work. It’s not that I’m lazy (though I would never be confused for a workaholic), it’s just nice to have an extra day to spend with my wife. Before I get too far into this, I should tell you that I love hanging out with my wife more than anything. She let’s me be me without any judgment. For those of you that haven’t married yet, this should be the number one thing you look for in a partner. I see people who can’t be comfortable in their own home and in their own skin and I feel really bad for them. I don’t think I could live that way.
Anyway, enough gushy stuff, let’s get on with how our day went. So, I’ve mentioned that I recently published a book, The Killer and Boyd Burgess, (I really will stop self-promoting eventually), and we are trying to find creative ideas to include on my author website. The goal is to continue putting bonus content on the page so that fans feel like they get their money’s worth. Plus, I just have more information that wouldn’t have fit smoothly in the book that the audience needs to know. So at some point in our day, Kayla and I sat down and did some audio recordings that will eventually be on my author website. Believe it or not, working on that doesn’t feel like work at all. It was time consuming, and I had to use my brain, but we were together, and I was really, really happy! The day was off to a good start.
We started building momentum from there. Some of our closest friends have undertaken a big project this summer. They are building a home! It is very exciting, but the downside has been that they have been busy and we really haven’t been able to spend any time with them. We all got together and decided Labor Day was a good day to change that. We made plans to see a movie, The Butler, and go to dinner afterwards with some other very close friends. Holidays don’t usually go as well as planned in my world, but this one seemed fool-proof and I was really looking forward to the rest of my day.
Our friends arrived at 3:30 and we were off to the show. The car ride provided good conversation; we all enjoyed the movie, and the buttery popcorn. As a side note, let me say that I will go and see basically anything if I can have a big bag of buttery, greasy popcorn. The movie ended, we lingered for a few minutes in the lobby of the Cinemark, before the four of us drove over to McAlister’s Deli for another exciting meeting with more friends.
During this time, I got an encouraging call from my dad. He was excited! He spent his day volunteering at a local soup kitchen. He got to break up a fight, and then, after a thirty minute conversation, he introduced a man to Jesus for the first time. Salvation is a wonderful thing! I’m really proud of my dad! He is a walking picture of the gospel for people to see. His heart is huge and his smile is infectious. I really hope I can learn to be like him. When we got off the phone, I went to finish my dinner with my friends and we lingered in conversation until the moment when everybody really needed to leave: Deadlines and papers due and groceries to buy and long drives awaited.
We all walked outside and as we were saying our goodbyes, a young couple approached and said hello. They were sun burnt very badly and looked worn down. They asked if we knew of a church that would be open locally on Labor Day and said that they could use some help…We didn’t. They went on with their story. They had walked from DuQuoin, Illinois to Paducah, Kentucky to try to find anyone who could help them get a place to stay for the night. My heart started to break. I thought that I needed to call my dad. I knew he would help and I knew he would know what to do, but something stopped me. A voice inside said, "If I want to be like him, I need to take responsibility for this situation." Without another thought, I started calling local hotels until I found one willing to work with me to get this couple a place to sleep.
I sent my wife and my friend’s wife with our other friends. They were so wonderful, offering to go and buy food for this husband and wife in need. Meanwhile, my friend Adam and I got the couple into our car so we could get them off of their tired feet and into a hotel room. The car ride over was very nice. They entertained us with stories and were so thankful that we were willing to lend a hand.
Before we left them, I was blessed enough to pray with and for the young couple that we were privileged enough to meet. They were again very gracious. We shook hands, made sure they were comfortable, and left them in peace. The thought came to me as we drove away, “For that you have done for the least of these, also you have done for me.” I hope that God was smiling down on us. I hesitate telling you this, but we were not the first people this couple had asked for help. Other churches called the police on them and turned them away. Jesus said, “Blessed are the poor.” I am ashamed to know how hard our world has become.
I hope that happy couple saw Jesus in our actions. I hope that they saw him as refuge from the storms of life. I hope they didn’t see Jesus in the face of their critics, because he wasn’t there. I know that I’m flawed, and that I don’t always give a perfect testimony in action or in word, but I know that the world doesn’t need the police called. People need a hand and they need love. I was so honored to meet the happy couple who had walked such a long way. I hope they know how much they blessed me. I know that sounds selfish, but I’m only human.
For me, all of that added together to be a pretty incredible Labor Day. I didn’t do everything right and I never will, but yesterday reminded me that in everything, Jesus loves me and he loves you too!

My Wife Made Me Do It...

So my wife has put the bug in my ear that I need to start a blog page. Now that I have a book up for sale (The Killer and Boyd Burgess), I need to showcase my writing in a more immediate way. So I go through the excuses. “I don’t know what I’d talk about. I don’t know if I’ll have time. I don’t know who would care to read what I have to say.” Her response to that was yelling at me, telling me to quit whining, and prodding me further to think about blogging.

Then comes my next line of defense, which was, of course, very similar to my first line of defense. I ask a logical question. “What will I write about?” After she rolls her eyes and bites down hard, composure returns. She calms herself and asks a very sensible question: “What do you think the world needs most?” Wow! I’m not sure that I’m smart enough to get to the bottom line as quickly as she just did. Of course! If I want people to read my work, shouldn’t it be about things that are important to me? I love my wife! She’s brilliant!

It doesn’t take me long to ponder the answer either. I’ve always known what I think the world needs to hear. That is, aside from all of the things that I spend my time thinking and dreaming about. The world needs help. The world needs light. The world needs direction. The world needs love. When I put all of that together, what I come up with is simple. The world needs Jesus!

“Oh, no,” you’re now thinking to yourself. “This guy is another religious fanatic that’s about to grab a soap box to stand on, become holier than thou, and eventually start preaching.” Well that’s precisely the opposite of what I plan on doing. My plan is to build a relationship with you, whoever you are, by showing you just how normal and non-preachy I am. I want you to see how flawed I am, how weird I can be, how strange some of my interests are, how much I miss the mark, how frustrating life gets, how terrifying it is to write a book, how deflated my balloon gets, how much I love Ohio State Football, how much I wish I could eat unhealthy food 24 hours a day, how much I long for a life filled with vacation, how much the hair on my back makes me feel like I’m part alien and part ape, and how none of that matters because Jesus loves me in spite of who I am. I want you to see that his grace is sufficient for me, and for you, no matter who you are. I want to talk about how wonderful a savior I have and how my hope is for everyone to meet him and have relationship with him.

The tricky parts come now. In order to do this, I have to convince you, whoever you are, to keep reading, not just until the end of this post, but more and more every time I post again. I have to find a way to entertain and inform. I have to be very personal instead of very preachy. I have to gain your trust; otherwise, I’ll fail miserably at introducing you to the man I know.

My hope is that you’ll give me a chance. I know that religion is a tough pill to swallow and that more people have been hurt by religion than by anything else in the history of the world, but that’s really the point. I have no interest in telling you about a religion. My goal is to tell you about a relationship that I have and how wonderful it is. If you will give me the opportunity, I vow that I will never try to beat you up. I will try my best to never give misinformation, and even correct bad information that’s been circulated in the past. I will show you my humanity and my flaws. I will talk about things that are important to me in my own unique way. I will even concede to try and not overreact when SEC fans take shots at my beloved Buckeyes and how soft their schedule is. (Ladies, don’t lose interest, there will be more covered than just sports, I promise.) If you’ll give me a chance and keep reading, I’ll give you insight into the life of Nathan C. Vance, I’ll answer questions about anything you ask me, I’ll even tell you about writers that I like if you care to know. I will try my best to keep from self-promoting and I will be as honest as is humanly possible.

So the question remains: why call it “The Utility Blog?” Utility means the greatest good for the greatest number. I’m hoping that’s exactly what this blog is.

My wife is usually my editor, but she is also an 8^th grade Language Arts teacher and head of a high school basketball program. There will be times when she isn’t able to proofread my blog before I post and I will undoubtedly get things wrong. Please forgive my grammar and punctuation mistakes. I promise you, when she does read the blog, I will be in plenty of trouble. What I want you to see is that I’m not perfect by any means, and that’s really the entire point. I’m writing to show my imperfection so that you can see someone who is perfect and how his grace carries me through. Don’t we all need that type of grace?